Team Slovenia - Day 7

The weather around Sheffield was looking a bit patchy and so I took a gamble on Robin Hoods Stride\Cratcliffe being in nick and following an unplanned detour after missing a junction we arrived at a dry but rather breezy crag. With large amounts of skin having been lost to Bentley's the day before and only one day till the CWIF qualifications Jernej took a day off from climbing and the grit sighed a huge relief. Therefore the duty of continuing Team Slovenia's assault on the grit fell to Jakob instead though Bentley's hadn't left him in much better condition in the skin front to be honest but it was his last day and skin would grow again. Game on!

Warmed up at RHS on Angle Arête but watching me on this one would have thought that I had never been climbing before, let alone done the problem more than once but after four or five rubbish attempts I got it sent. Things improved with The Spine (the opposing arête) getting done first go but the harder variation - Spine Left Hand - seemed absolutely desperate and while I could get established on the start from there it wasn't happening. The various twinges from my left shoulder meant that it wasn't too happy about things either so I decided to go for the tactical retreat and try something else.

Walking a bit further round RHS I decided to have a go at another of my projects, Sweet Arête which proved to be anything but really. I am going to have to rethink the tactics on this one and see if I can get a sneaky heel in for the left foot as the move off the ground to the higher "hold" on the arête is proving way too low percentage at the minute. As it is most times I slap up with the left hand and while I can hold it there occasionally there also seems to be a microscopic pebble that while stood on the ground is as good as invisible. When trying the problem though the pebble magically grows and I hit it with the tip of my middle finger nine times out of ten which bloody hurts when you are trying to stick the move - yet another reason to rethink the sequence I think. Team Slovenia then had a go at Sweet Thing and got completely shut down on it until a quick perusal of the guide book gave up the information that it had not been climbed since a hold was lost in way of explanation of why it was so hard.

With that we decided to stomp over the hill to Cratcliffe instead as I wanted to have a look at yet another project that I have been trying on and off for what is probably years - Egg Arête. I probably should have given up on arêtes by this stage as I had taken a bit of a battering on them during the afternoon but regardless I threw myself at the latest contender in a great show of effort and a distinct lack of skill. This approach ultimately ended up with yet another ignominious defeat to my name but as a reward of sorts I was left with a severely bruised left palm to go with the hole in my finger, something I was so happy that I threw a climbing shoe at the boulder in a fit of pique. Not my greatest moment maybe but I felt better. 

Lastly it was the short walk over to T-Crack for Jakob - he really should have done it first go but he had every one of his tips taped up by this stage and when he got to the sloper over the roof he couldn't get enugh purchase to hold the move and so dropped off. While sat at the bottom of the problem removing the finger tape he looked at me and said "This is for Cratcliffe" and once he had removed it all he blitzd the problem with what seemed to be very little effort and a great deal of style before repeating it again for the camera. 

Beast!

Team Slovenia - Day 6

Day 6 dawned a bit grey and overcast but by the afternoon Sheffield was clear and sunny so it was off to Stanage. We arrived sometime after 1PM and headed up to the Not To Be Taken Away block to warm up - Jernej quickly doing NTBTA again while I headed off to try a few of the easier problems on the slabs to get into the groove. After a bit of sitting about in the sun I pulled on my shoes and did Back Cover on The Nameless Block again just in time to see Jernej topping out Big Air  (E6 6b). He had committed to the jump across a couple of times on the Tuesday (the crux according to the BMC guide) and had obviously decided that leaping back again wasn't providing enough of a challenge any more. No mats or anything so it was definitely done "trad" style and as far as I am concerned onsight as well.

I congratulated him on that and did Shady Slab (with and without the starting block) before moving rightwards onto The Mental Block to try the problems there - again nice slab problems but that little bit harder and that little bit higher as well. I blew the start on the flash of Scoops Groove but got it second go and following some tenuous padding I got to the top feeling somewhat relieved and just in time to see Jernej halfway through an onsight solo of The Don (E4 5c). I spent the next few minutes enduring that strange sense of fear you get when watching someone on something a bit necky until he got to the top of the main arête when I went back to enjoying the sun instead. With the main part of the climbing over I provided a few instructions on where to go from there and when he returned I asked him what he thought of it to which his reply was something along the lines of "Didn't like it much as I had to mantle!" Nothing about it being hard, scary or the like, just that it had a mantle in it and from there conversation drifted onto Ulysses (E6 6b) which he was sorely tempted by but ultimately refused as it was only two days before the CWIF.

I wobbled up Scoops Slab which again featured some scary padding moves but kept at it as the guide said it gets easier as you gain height which is probably true but it didn't feel that way at the time and topped that out to Jakob having just sent his first confirmed Font 7c+ (Brad Pit no less). To say that he was pleased would have been an understatement - he was seriously made up by the fact and for good reason as it is a world class problem and not a bad one to move up the grade on either. He had been trying it on the Tuesday when conditions hadn't been as good and not had much success but with better conditions on the Thursday it went down first go!

Just to put this into some form of context I had just witnessed Big Air and The Don being soloed and Brad Pit being sent and we had only been at the crag for probably 90 minutes! It usually takes me that long to pull my shoes on...

Once things had calmed down a bit Team Slovenia then decided to get back on The Storm as it was out of the sun. Jernej was managing his skin so sacked it off early but Jakob was looking really good on it though quite how you can get this close to the final hold without doing the problem is beyond my ability to answer.

Perhaps the crag had decided to fight back as The Storm remained an elusive tick for Team Slovenia on that day as well and after it was off to The Pebble so that Jakob could have another look at Deliverance and Jernej could have a second attempt at the Joker.

The Joker quickly got sacked as it was in the sun and the holds were not working so it was down the hill to Deliverance. Jernej did it again with probably the highest foot placement I have ever seen used to do this and then it was up to Jakob. After a few attempts including one too short, one too high, one where he let go of the finishing hold in shock and with the added bonus of trashing the toe of his shoe on one of the pebbles it joined the list of problems dispatched. No such luck on my personal nemesis - Pebble Arête - I bailed after one half hearted attempt as I was just wasn't feeling the love for it. There were just too many people about and the last thing I needed while trying to climb it was a random collection of fuckwits masquerading as spotters with an accompaniment of blooring on about the science of placing mats and the like.

To get away from the above I went and had a play on Green Traverse and felt pretty strong on the opening moves but while I was trying to work out the crux the random collection of fuckwits masquerading as spotters returned to haunt me again (much to my great joy) so I went off and had a look at what Team Slovenia were up to. As previously mentioned they had done Captain Hook on the Tuesday and had turned their attention to the neighbouring problem Bentley's Gonna Sort You Out. True to its name it did - there was some seriously shredded skin (Jakob was bleeding on and off in a manner that can only be described as profusely) and there was also the odd random gurn on show for those who had a camera handy.

Regardless of the blood letting and gurning directed at it Bentley's refused to fall to the onslaught and while they both got close it ended up another problem to come back for instead.By this time the sun was dropping below the horizon so it was back to the van and a quick drive up the road for The Buckstone Dyno. This was one of the things on Team Slovenia's list of things to do and by the time we arrived it was rapidly getting dark so Team Slovenia didn't have long to crush. They didn't need it to be honest - one quick warm up later Jernej flashed it and Jakob got it second go - something which was becoming almost normal.

In summary another impressive day of crushing from Team Slovenia but all this crushing was taking its toll - how much longer could the skin last?

Team Slovenia - Day 5

Should you ever find a couple of Slovenia crushing machines in your house the following  "rules" will keep them more than happy.

• Feed them lots of tasty home-cooked food.
• Let them stream Futurama off the internet to keep them entertained whenever they are not climbing.
• Drive them about in a van with a big sound system with the bass turned right up and Techno on demand.
• Take them to lots of different gritstone crags, point them at various things that are famous\hard and watch them crush.

Day 5 saw Team Slovenia having a rest day following their exploits at Stanage the day before and therefore it was declared that it was my day to crush (albeit at a more mortal level). Given this it was an easy decision to go to Curbar for Round 1058 of Butters vs. The Ulitimate Gritstone Experience but before that though there was time for a quick guided tour of Baslow and another look at Fatworld.

We stomped over to the Eagle Stone and upon seeing that any idea of a rest day  was put to bed for Team Slovenia. After hanging off various parts of it in the guise of warming up Jernej got on the Send Train with a quick flash of "A Fistful of Beagles" and not wanting to be outdone Jakob promptly did the same.

Having dispatched that, attention was turned to "For A Few Beagles More" which prompted a few raised eyebrows with the guide book describing it as a highball and following a quick consultation regarding possible sequences Jernej was off.  He floated (almost literally it seemed) as far as the top break on the flash attempt before dropping off as it was more than a little dirty but after a quick brush that too was added to the list of problems done with ease and Jakob then did the same in (I think) two attempts.

Me? I just stood there and wondered what the fuck had just happened - two of the hardest problems on The Eagle Stone had been done in a total of six attempts! It was a bit of a shock to say the least.

They then looked at a The Bright Concept as a final possibility but the line wasn't that clear and it looked to be suffering a bit of run off so I suggested that we go and look at the hard classic of the crag - Flatworld - instead. I was hoping it might provide a bit more opposition to Team Slovenia but Jernej gave me barely enough time to get the camera out before he flashed it with what turned out, in retrospect, to be a duff sequence - a conclusion arrived at after he had done it a couple more times to provide beta for Jakob. As it was Jakob gave it more than a few good goes but even with the beta he couldn't get it sent though that was down to sore skin more than a lack of talent.

 

After a flash of the rather scrittly slab to the left by yours truly we had a look at Fatworld which I still can not figure out how to do. I have pretty much ruled out the high foot method as just feels totally wrong to me so I played around with the smear up the face method.instead which doesn't feel any easier but at least it feels possible. Jernej and Jakob both did it and both said that it was never Font 6a which led onto a consultation of the BMC guidebook grading charts. Now I have always worked on the assumption that V3 was somewhere about Font 6a but the BMC put this round about 6a+\6b which goes quite a long why  to explaining why I am regularly getting shut down on problems of that grade. Moans about grade conversions aside they seem to be consistent across the board so it is just a matter of adjusting ones sights accordingly and getting on with it.

Having solved that we set off to The Ultimate Gritstone Experience and by the time we got there I was really up for the problem and was convinced that the extra SYKE from Team Sovenia would be enough to get me up it. After a couple of goes to get the sequence refreshed in my head it was back up to my usual highpoint and I was feeling really solid on the bottom section. The foot swap was going really well with no sign of cutting loose and the moves were feeling about as easy as they have ever been to me. Third or fourth go I actually had both hands over the lip and realised that I had no idea what to do so I hung in desperately trying to figure out what to do before descending back onto the mats far quicker that I had got up there. From then on it was a matter of getting back to a similar point and trying something slightly different every time in an attempt at unlocking the top section and while none of them met with success I think I have a reasonable idea of what to do now. All that is required now is the small matter of doing it come round 1059... 

Team Slovenia. Days 1-4

Sometimes you do something a bit out of the ordinary and following one such example of doing this I have had Team Slovenia (aka Jernej and Jakob) staying at chez Butters in the run up to the CWIF.

Upon their arrival around midnight on Friday, they got given the spare set of keys, the latest Stanage guidebook, a very perfunctory guided tour to the house and the sat nav with instructions on how to work it so that they could get to The 'works on the following day. That done and out of the way I promptly went to bed and left them to it as I had to be in work for 7AM the following morning for the first of four day shifts. In all honesty this didn't amount to shining example of planning ones life and I must admit that I did feel a bit guilty about it but there was no way out of it. I should also point out that I am not usually this rude to guests unless the guest in question is Sloper in which case such behaviour is not only acceptable but positively encouraged.

I returned the following night and Team Slovenia had found the 'works and by all accounts had crushed  and, more importantly, had managed to procure a lift for the following day out to the Peak which made me feel a lot better about things. They also got very excited after watching Commited and fancied a crack at The Angel's Share adding that UKB's finest Johnny Brown didn't trust his feet enough and though  I tried to explain that JB was a paragon of footwork over dinner I got the impression that it had been lost in translation somewhere down the line.

Day Two was Burbage in typically English weather conditions - rain clearing to sunshine and then a snow shower to finish off the day, a combination that the average British climber wouldn't bat an eyelid at but it was probably a bit of a shock to them. In the short spell of "decent weather" Jernej sent Blind Fig and then once the weather went back to being rubbish they had a guided tour of Stanage and then  from there onto Raven Tor to look at horrible crimps by all accounts.

Day Three was a rest day and, more importantly, dedicated to the production of Panckes of Power!

The Pancake of Power is just an ordinary pancake but filled with Chocolate Spread and Crunchy Peanut Butter resulting in something that tastes like a bit like a Snickers bar. Granted it sounds a bit random but they are actually really good and a quick calculation on the back of an imaginary fag packet shows that they produce lots of crushing power - get in your kitchen and knock a few of those beasts out before you head to the crag!

Suitably armed Team Slovenia hitched out to Stanage on Day Four and got rolling - Brad Pit, Deliverance, Captain Hook (2nd go), Green Traverse (flash) and Not To Be Taken Away all got crushed  by Jernej though The Storm held up under the onslaught due to being in the sun. Somewhere in amongst all of  that Jernej also started working The Joker and had a look at the start of Big Air going so far as jumping across before deciding that it wasn't the day for it. Not sure what Jakob did but I can say that Deliverance and Brad Pit escaped his personal onslaught for that day at least.

The following day however was Day Five and Butters was finally off shift!